Princess Pony Head Vs The Forces of Saint Olga's Academy
by Creative.Names.FTW
Summary: Saint Olga is no saint. I never wanted to see her again, she broke my heart. And if I'm supposed to go to her and Ludo's reform "school", I WILL bring them down with me. Even if it requires dressing up as a guy, enrolling in the guys reform school for wayward princes, seducing an old friend(?). I'll make sure there'll be nothing left for Star. Rated T for references and language.


"...No prison can hold me for long!" I screamed to Star and Marco, eyes widening, voice echoing.

Then I was shoved through the glittering portal, arriving in front of a hell hole.

My father, King Ponyhead, had sent my luggage ahead, knowing my rebellion would be futile.

Well he didn't know shit!

Every Princess knows that Saint Olga's Academy for Wayward princesses was just a coverup for Ludo to destroy our self esteem and powers. And here my idiotic Papa was, signing my soul over along with our kingdom.

I floated along the bloodied halls, sighing dramatically each time I passed by a security camera. I gave a nod to each princess I knew as I pass by the rebels, cursing, spitting, and other various stereotypical "teenage" things to do.

"Yo P.H. !"

"Hey Crystal Pri."

"Heeeey! Ponyhead!"

"Hi Chika Princess."

I blow fire from my nose at the smell of _shame_ and _whore_ mixed together. Bleach blonde hair. Neon green contacts. A red and ravenous crystal flying squirrel by her side. She was decked out in a leather dress, equipped with armor, and a sheathe for her giant battle hammer.

"So you were finally captured, Stuffing?"

She swept her high ponytail back over her right eye, the weirdest and most U-G-L-Y hairstyle ever created.

"Aw, nice to see you've missed me, Whore Olga! Don't worry, I still hate you and your fake little body," I sarcastically winked, then raced forward to impale her dark skinned face.

She grabbed my horn, pulling my mane back with one hand. Then she broke half of my horn off. "Oh it's going to be fun breaking you again."

I snorted again, trying my best to ignore the blood dripping into sight.

Chika princess raced forward, slamming a feathered fist into the wall next to Olga's head. The wall shattered, a branching crater remaining like a glass mirror.

"Oi, oi! What do ye think ya doin to ma friend P.H.?"

Olga scoffed, released her grip, then dragged a finger across my cheek. "Don't think I haven't missed you~"

"Don't think I've forgotten about how you had sex with Tom~" I replied in the same overly sweet tone- relishing her burnt red blush.

The entire hall was a chaotic mess of laughter and taunts. Hey, don't underestimate a couple of girls who have been deprived of their fair share of TV, wifi, and, most especially, freedom.

Chika ushered me into her room, shooing out some girly pop princess room mate, saying she could go stay with the Loch Ness Luch Lady. She slowly sat me down on her bed, pulling out the feather flipper, the Chicken hierarchy heirloom.

"Link the pink, fix the kinks, make the room totally me!" Hers have to somewhat rhyme, so it always sounds like a corny ripoff of a bad poem.

The room's shades of pinks were drained and replaced with blues in a vortex and color explosion.

"So."

"So."

I used my tongue to open my suitcase, hanging my horse locket around my neck with an immense struggle. Slowly, a material body returned.

My bright pink hair was styled into a braid, glitter adorning blue ribbons intricately weaved into it. A pair of black overalls formed first, Chika visibly cringing.

"Uh... Hun... Hate to say it but-" "Wait. A. moment!" I yelled, rolling my eyes in exasperation.

Shortly after, the jean overalls's pant legs gave away, leaving behind a pair of roughly cut shorts. The air around my waist began to glitter with red sparkles, a sheer skirt forming down to my knees. A curved slit in the front gave it the impression of a ball gown.

"Ooh! I forgot about that P.H. ! Maybe I could borrow it sometime soon? ...wait. What about yer hands?"

I looked down at my hands, ashamed to see that they still didn't look fully human-like. All of my skin was still an inhuman shade of pale blue, and my finger nails resembled small clear hooves.

"Hey, what do you expect Chika? We can't all be perfect. Otherwise we'd be fake."

"You see, there's the floating head that I remember. The one who randomly says sentimental stuff in awkward moments."

The door slammed open, revealing one pissed wayward princess. "What the hell are _**you**_ doing here, Hay Breath?!"

"Oh. So nice to see you too Ninjika." She threw a giant sword at me, resulting in a deflection using my half-horn.

"Definitely missed your wimpy sword too..."

Her black wild mane of hair exploded out of a ponytail, the top of her head covered by a wide,cloth camo headband. She made her gold cat eyes even more venomous in appearance when she glared. "WHAT. ARE. YOU. DOING. IN. MY. DOJO."

"Relax Ninja Samurai stereotype hybrid. We can all get along."

"Im now looking forward to killing you in your sleep."

* * *

**Hello! You can call me L.P., and this is my first fanfic I've posted, so reviews would be really helpful! This is just kind of a pilot for an idea I've been having, so please tell me what you think! R&amp;R, thank you, and see you guys next time!**


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